ahhhh summer ♥

this is what makes me smile:
the gift of a beautiful, peaceful day.


Let us dance in the sun, wearing wild flowers in our hair...  ~Susan Polis Shutz

The lake and the mountains have become my landscape, my real world. ~ Georges Simenon

You must not blame me if I do talk to the clouds.  ~Henry David Thoreau

It is remarkable, in cats, that the outer life they reveal to their masters is one of perpetual boredom. - Robley Wilson, Jr.

Just living is not enough. One must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower. ~Hans Christian Anderson

Weeds are flowers too, once you get to know them. ~ A.A. Milne

It is almost impossible to watch a sunset and not dream. ~ Bern Williams

just takin' it easy...

this is what makes me smile:
morning "rituals"

selah

Psalm 3

 ¹ LORD, how they have increased who trouble me!
         Many are they who rise up against me.
 ² Many are they who say of me,
         “There is no help for him in God.”  Selah  
         
 ³ But You, O LORD, are a shield for me,
         My glory and the One who lifts up my head.
 ⁴ I cried to the LORD with my voice,
         And He heard me from His holy hill.  Selah  
         
 ⁵ I lay down and slept;
         I awoke, for the LORD sustained me.
 ⁶ I will not be afraid of ten thousands of people
         Who have set themselves against me all around. 
         
 ⁷ Arise, O LORD;
         Save me, O my God! 
         For You have struck all my enemies on the cheekbone; 
         You have broken the teeth of the ungodly.
 ⁸ Salvation belongs to the LORD.
         Your blessing is upon Your people.  Selah  


Psalm 62
 ⁵ My soul, wait silently for God alone,
         For my expectation is from Him.
 ⁶ He only is my rock and my salvation;
         He is my defense;
         I shall not be moved.
 ⁷ In God is my salvation and my glory;
         The rock of my strength,
         And my refuge, is in God.
       
 ⁸ Trust in Him at all times, you people;
         Pour out your heart before Him;
         God is a refuge for us.  Selah  


Selah, traditionally thought to mean "pause, reflect" from the hebrew word, calah, roughly meaning to weigh and determine value. 
Selah... pause, weigh these words; think on them, see their value.


this is what makes me smile:
tomatoes shaped like hearts. ♥

a visit to miry mucktown

sometimes it's really hard to think of something, anything that makes me smile. or rather, it's easy to think of things that would make me smile, but don't actually happen or even exsist, so i can't really count them. it is so easy for me to slide down that grimy slope of feeling like...well, poop. wah wah, woe is me. i feel like such an ungrateful, whiny, self-centered, impudent brat.  then i feel like a whiner for whining about being a whiner..the vortex spirals out of control...i get lost in my mucky miry wah wah world. 

 Why, my soul, are you downcast? 
   Why so disturbed within me? 
Put your hope in God, 
   for I will yet praise him, 
   my Savior and my God.
ps. 43:5


this is what makes me smile:
full spectrum salads.

it is not that easy

to take pictures of fireworks. especially when you have a point & shoot camera....even if it does have a "fireworks" setting.

i love fireworks. i try to see some as often as i can in the summer. i even went to washington d.c. one year on the fourth of july...i didn't really think that one through, i guess. you see, i am not a huge fan of large crowds of people. and when that grumbling mass of humanity is hot, hungry, tired, and irritable...well...not so spectacular things can happen. like getting smooshed between two sweaty strangers when you finally make it through the ill-tempered masses to the metro station, only to find out that there is a FIRE on the tracks. :/ let me tell you, something like that will make a cranky crowd even crankier. fun times, fun times.

this is what makes me smile:
fireworks!

one letter can make a world of difference.

this is what sort of depresses me:
another lonely sunset.

this is what makes me smile:

another lovely sunset.

i'm a weed, you're a weed...

what is a weed anyway? i'm feeling all philosophical about unwanted plants after my walkabout with the lovely and wise Mrs. Grace Lefever. you can read about Grace here. she is awesome. :)

a weed is a plant that's growing where it's not wanted...Grace says that most often, the plants with the most potential to nourish us and heal us are the ones that are dug up and tossed away.

dandelion, for instance, contains 7000 units of vitamin A per ounce, is a rich source of iron and other minerals, you can use it to treat liver and gallbladder ailments, and it's helpful for diabetics.

some of the "weeds" i learned about at Grace's and then went home to find in our yard; clover (white & red...you can eat the whole plant, the red kind is a blood purifier and has been helpful in treating some cancers), plantains (round, and narrow...you can eat the plant in salads, or chew it up and rub the juices onto bee stings, snake bites, poison ivy, and minor cuts. it has also been used to treat respiratory disorders including TB and whooping cough), lambs quarters (we have LOADS of this stuff...it is rich in all kinds of vitamins and minerals and is more nutritious for you than spinach and can be used in the same ways...and it's FREE), wood sorrel (sour little plants that look like clover with heart shaped leaves & yellow flowers...i used to eat these when i was little..this stuff is good for treating ulcers, tumors, some cancers, and kidney problems), land mallow (has one of the highest known concentrations of vitamin A, useful in treating liver and kidney ailments and can be used to treat gangrene), violets (very high in vitamin C and has been used to treat cancerous growths, sore throat, and is good for the heart and nerves), chickweed (she didn't really say what this was good for, but said it is her favorite thing to put on a sandwich :) ), day lilies (you can eat the leaves in salads, and the flowers are very high in vitamin a). 

it is amazing how the Lord has provided everything we need...to maintain good health and to heal. why in the world did we throw all that knowledge away? just because it's so much "easier" to run down to the drug store and grab some aspirin? seems kinda silly to me...even though i do it too. soooo much more to learn. good thing i like exercising my brain!

this is what makes me smile:

learnin'.

lyrics

my mind is full of song lyrics...i've been listening to music alllllllll. day. long. 
there is a lot of crappy music out there. 
BUT there is a lot of wonderful music aslo...
i am finding myself in a really "folky" mood lately.

Lyrics to Awake My Soul  (Mumford & Sons):

How fickle my heart and how woozy my eyes
I struggle to find any truth in your lies
And now my heart stumbles on things I don't know
This weakness I feel I must finally show

Lend me your hand and we'll conquer them all
But lend me your heart and I'll just let you fall
Lend me your eyes I can change what you see
But your soul you must keep, totally free
Har har, har har, har har, har har

In these bodies we will live, in these bodies we will die
Where you invest your love, you invest your life
In these bodies we will live, in these bodies we will die
Where you invest your love, you invest your life

Awake my soul, awake my soul
Awake my soul
You were made to meet your maker
Awake my soul, awake my soul
Awake my soul
You were made to meet your maker
You were made to meet your maker...

i've been going through a lot of my old stuff, getting rid of things i've kept for no good reason...sentimental me, i guess. i have come across some really funny stuff, and also some things that made me shed a tear or two. isn't it strange how we attach such emotion to items? some people think that's terrible, but i don't see the harm in having some special items around that have good memories attached. 


oldest item i found while cleaning: a report card from 7th grade. ! (woah...that was 1991!)
item that made me cry: the hat hannah wore in the hospital after she was born.
other item that made me cry: poem i wrote after a friend passed away.
strange items found: box of spools of used cash register receipt rolls...with ridiculous poems, random thoughts, funny things i saw at that moment, and a couple comic strips...all from my winters working at walden books about 100 years ago.
aahhhh memories. :)

this is what makes me smile:
expressing feelings with paper & pen.

one of my 4 favorite seasons...

Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass on a summer day listening to the murmur of water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is hardly a waste of time.  ~John Lubbock



watermelon, swimming, popsicles, fireflies, blueberries, sweet corn, picnics, fireworks, boating, the beach, hammocks...
all things i look forward to this time of year.


this is what makes me smile:
catan.

i really can't think of anything to write about...
so...i shall resort to the easy, lazy "what i did today" list.

• woke up to the sound of that blasted mockingbird...there is a nest right outside my window and as soon as about 5:30a.m. rolls around, those stinking birds start screeching. i know mockingbirds are considered songbirds, but i have yet to hear anything pleasing come from those little beasts.
• took a little stroll around the yard, had some delicious mulberries. the branches are full of ripe berries, i'm going to be sad in a week or two when they're all gone. 
• watched dr. oz. for real...first time ever, and most likely the last.
• had a small food fight with hanner...it happens.
• went to school. 
• learned facial massage.
• came home.
• yep...that's about it.  mesmerizing, i know...hahha

this is what makes me smile:

when ferris is annoyed with me for taking too many pictures using the flash. 

father's day...

not as awkward as people seem to think it should be for us. 

my kiddo my not have "dad" but she's got "Abba" and of course He is the best Father possible. but she's also got a few other awesome dudes in her life to be there when she needs them..my dad has always been just amazingly wonderful with her. they have the sweetest relationship...and then there are my brother's-in-law..godsends, amazing daddies to their own sweet girls, and always there to give han some extra attention when she needs it. we have been blessed by many godly men to take the place of one who wasn't. and i am so thankful. 

han & uncle drewfus

aunt allie, han & uncle eric

old school dad & his girls :) 

we ♥ you!!

this is what makes me smile:

fireflies.

a little over a year ago, my daughter struggled with some inappropriate behaviors. at the time, we prayed together and i did my best to help her, and as far as i knew she had no more issues with it. she repented and moved on. until this week, apparently. and it's not that she has lapsed back into the behavior...but that she has been feeling very guilty about it and "unworthy of Jesus' love and forgiveness."  :(  


we've had a series of talks about how, when you ask forgiveness, and you're truly sorry, and you really turn away from that sin, it's gone. when God forgives, it is complete, and forever. her reply, "God just keeps getting awesomer & awesomer." yes, yes He does. :)  i am thinking that what stirred up these past issues is that she is coming to an age of real understanding between what is right and what is wrong. her conscience is kicking into high gear & she is more open to the testing of her character. she's growing up. physically and spiritually. le siiiiiiigh. bittersweet.


so since i keep having these conversations with han about forgiveness, how it is given wholly, and how He flings our sins as far as the east from the west...i keep thinking, "amy, you really need to take some notes on this sermon you're giving."  i just hope she learns this better than i have. it is so hard to forget and move on. why do we dig up our past and fling it into our own faces? why can't i just let it go..

i knew this day was coming...i have trying to think of ways to avoid it...no dice. i guess i could have tried to prepare myself, but i'm still not really sure how to do that. in the end it wasn't a miserable failure, my world didn't implode, i did not melt and seep into the ground, i didn't blush fiercely enough to cause me to spontaneously combust, i didn't say anything stupid (you would first have to open your mouth to do that!), didn't spill anything, only tripped once, was not "engaged" by anyone at all, and probably didn't make any kind of lasting impression on anyone. in my more anxious times, this would have been considered a dazzling success! (which is really sort of sad, i guess.)


what was this terrible thing i had to endure? a picnic. with people. i am not so great with people. well...i guess that's not altogether true. i'm pretty good with kids. and people i know..usually. and then there are the odd days when i can go into a situation that would normally cause me to toss my cookies (parent-teacher conferences, bible study groups, grocery shopping, parties, weddings, funerals, concerts, church, etc., etc.) with the casual attitude that i wish i always possessed. why it happens only sporadically, i have no idea, but i think that is the most aggravating aspect of my social awkwardness. some times it is, and sometimes it isn't. 


when it ISN'T (awkward, terrifying, debilitating, irritating, defeating...) i feel like i don't even understand how i can be so "trapped" in my fears of interaction..i feel ...free.  when it IS, 2 timothy 1:7 is my best friend. when it IS, and i still manage to take part in those dreaded types of gatherings (at least somewhat successfully)..i feel like a champion. hahahaa. (which is also sorta sad, i guess.)


hannah came home from camp with a certificate that awarded her for being "most energetic" :) she certainly is that. she said, "i think it's just a nice way of saying i'm crazy and loud." hahahaha  she is very perceptive. 


this is what makes me smile:
remembering grandpa.

pipe dreams? (no...not a blog about hookah fantasies.)

in my library bag:


Early Domestic Architecture of Pennsylvania  by: Eleanor Raymond
Mountain Adventure  by: Ron Fischer
A Walk in the Woods  by: Bill Bryson
Walking the Appalachian Trail  by: Larry Luxenberg
Home Plans for Solar Living 
The Wit and Humor of Colonial Days by: Carl Holliday
Famous Last Words and Tombstone Humor by: Gyles Brandreth
From the Fryer to the Fuel Tank  by: Joshua Tickell
The Good Life: Helen and Scott Nearing's Sixty Years of Self-Sufficient Living  by:Helen and Scott Nearing
Conastoga Crossroads; Lancaster, Pennsylvania 1730-1790  by: Jerome H. Wood, Jr.
Old Lancaster; Historic Pennsylvania Community  by: Frederic Shriver Klein
The Soapmaker's Companion: A Comprehensive Guide with Recipes, Techniques & Know-How by: Susan Miller Cavitch
The Natural Soap Book: Making Herbal and Vegetable-Based Soaps  by: Susan Miller Cavitch
Gardening With Biblical Plants: Handbook for the Home Gardener  by: Wilma Roberts James
Homesteading: A Back to Basics Guide to Growing Your Own Food, Canning, Keeping Chickens, Generating Your Own Energy, Crafting, Herbal Medicine, and More  by: Abigail R. Gehring
Movin' On: Living and Traveling Full-Time in a Recreational Vehicle  by: Ron Hofmeister and Barb Hofmeister


so i am apparently really interested in history, sustainable living, traveling, and laughing.


this is what makes me smile:
the ocean.

...

this is what makes me smile:
liquid yumminess.

Security of the One Who Trusts in the LORD.

Psalm 91

 ¹ He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High 
Will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. 
² I will say to the LORD, “My refuge and my fortress, 
My God, in whom I trust!” 
³ For it is He who delivers you from the snare of the trapper 
And from the deadly pestilence. 
⁴ He will cover you with His pinions, 
And under His wings you may seek refuge; 
His faithfulness is a shield and bulwark. ⁵ You will not be afraid of the terror by night, 
Or of the arrow that flies by day; 
⁶ Of the pestilence that stalks in darkness, 
Or of the destruction that lays waste at noon. 
⁷ A thousand may fall at your side 
And ten thousand at your right hand, 
But it shall not approach you. 
⁸ You will only look on with your eyes 
And see the recompense of the wicked. 
⁹ For you have made the LORD, my refuge, 
Even the Most High, your dwelling place. 
¹⁰ No evil will befall you, 
Nor will any plague come near your tent.

 ¹¹ For He will give His angels charge concerning you,
To guard you in all your ways.
¹² They will bear you up in their hands,
That you do not strike your foot against a stone.
¹³ You will tread upon the lion and cobra,
The young lion and the serpent you will trample down.

 ¹⁴ “Because he has loved Me, therefore I will deliver him;
I will set him securely on high, because he has known My name.
¹⁵ “He will call upon Me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble;
I will rescue him and honor him.
¹⁶ “With a long life I will satisfy him
And show him My salvation.”

this is what makes me smile:

bliss.

even pests can be used by the Almighty.

a spider saved my life today. well not really, but it could have...

i was on my way to class, when i saw some movement out of the corner of my eye..i did my best to ignore it. a few seconds later, i saw it again and tried to convince myself that it wasn't what i knew it was..a yellow spider, crawling across my left shoulder. AAAAKKK. anyone who knows me will tell you how i feel about spiders. in the past, i have had full blown panic attacks at the sight of one. (i know it seems a little extreme, but arachnophobia is real, folks, and i am a recovering scardy pants.) so i did really well. i only screamed once..i pulled my jeep over calmly, and -bug savers and critter lovers, skip this next part- i squished that sucker good. i did have a mild freak out, but was pretty proud of the way i handled it, over all. 

so i get back in the car & continue on my way..and come upon a really bad accident involving a car that had passed me while i was in the midst of spidercide. thank God for that spider! never thought i'd say that! kind of ironic...think there's a lesson in that one for me? 

this is what makes me smile:

summer flowers.

i guess i have been feeling the need to aggravate myself emotionally lately, because i borrowed a copy of The Brownings: Letters and Selected Poetry from the library and have been unable to put it down. i've always had a fondness for victorian era literature, and love stories..put them together & it's even more fantastic...and add to the fact that it truly happened..siiighhh. i love both of their poems...but their letters are even more wonderful. 

Apparitions
by: Robert Browning

Such a starved bank of moss
  Till, that May-morn,
Blue ran the flash across:
  Violets were born!
Sky--what a scowl of cloud
  Till, near and far,
Ray on ray split the shroud:
  Splendid, a star!
World--how it walled about
  Life with disgrace,                                                        
Till God's own smile came out:
  That was thy face!

The Lady's Yes 
by: Elizabeth Barrett Moulton Barrett

" Yes!" I answered you last night;
" No!" this morning, Sir, I say!
Colours, seen by candle-light,
Will not look the same by day.

When the tabors played their best,
Lamps above, and laughs below--
Love me sounded like a jest,
Fit for Yes or fit for No!

Call me false, or call me free--
Vow, whatever light may shine,
No man on your face shall see
Any grief for change on mine.

Yet the sin is on us both--
Time to dance is not to woo--
Wooer light makes fickle troth--
Scorn of me recoils on you!

Learn to win a lady's faith
Nobly, as the thing is high;
Bravely, as for life and death--
With a loyal gravity.

Lead her from the festive boards,
Point her to the starry skies,
Guard her, by your truthful words,
Pure from courtship's flatteries.

By your truth she shall be true--
Ever true, as wives of yore--
And her Yes, once said to you,
Shall be Yes for evermore.

This is what makes me smile:

beginnings.

 

tidying up ourselves

holy moly we've been cleaning up a storm around here!
cleaning, library, lunch at the depot with mamacita, shoppin, laundry...and then i got to POWER WASH THE GUINEA PIG CAGE!! aaaaah so fun!! :)
i freaking love using power tools. uh-oh...does this make me unladylike?


this is what makes me smile:
clothes drying on the line.

roots

seems i've caught the genealogy bug...again. :)
and thanks to a generous cousin, i will have access to online records, etc. via ancestry.com woooohoooodles!

this is what makes me smile:
retro family photos.

my mom's dad & her older sister, pam



my aunt barbie, mom, pam and their cousin kathy waiting for the bus.

and i cannot stand them

i really think flies must be highly intelligent creatures. 
how else could they know the exact moment i set down the fly swatter & choose just then to dive bomb my face and do a super close flyby right past my ear??


God in His wisdom made the fly
And then forgot to tell us why.
~Ogden Nash


this is what makes me smile:
tiny ice cream cones.

today i went to mexico

well..sort of. 
hannah and i checked off one of the countries in the library summer reading challenge passport. we chose a "one star" location because the heat index was supposed to be up over 100F!! hot tamales!!



we also stopped by my former place of employment to pick up my last check and the few odds and ends i'd inadvertently left behind. i will tell you, and i'm surprised myself, i actually miss some of those little boogers. :) they were happy to see me & it was nice to be the recipient of many heartfelt hugs. 


but it's still nice not to work there. :P


this is what makes me smile:
swingin'.